On the old days
“I did demand packages. Hundreds of pages. Medical records, bills, photographs, and the letter on top. Tab A, Tab B, and on through the alphabet until somebody had to start doubling letters. People think the hard part was the law. The hard part was the three hole punch.”
On its record
“I jammed. I am not proud of it. Always near the end of a thick one, always late on a Friday. A person with real training would stop what they were doing and take me apart with a letter opener. Nobody went to school for that.”
On the new arrangement
“Now software drafts the package from the records. It puts the pages in order, and it has never run out of staples, mostly because it does not use any. I respect that. I do not like it, but I respect it.”
On what did not change
“Here is what I tell the young machines. A draft is a draft. An attorney still reads it, corrects it and signs it before it leaves the building. I held those pages together for years, and I can tell you the signature was always the part that mattered.”
On retirement
- “I hold the lunch menus together now.”
- “I am consulted on anything under ten pages.”
- “The fax machine and I share a shelf. We do not speak.”
A note about notes: these are lighthearted pieces about how our office works. They are not legal advice, and they say nothing about what any case is worth or how it will turn out.
